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In How to Be Miserable, psychologist Randy Paterson outlines 40 specific behaviors and habits, which—if followed—are sure to lead to a lifetime of unhappiness. On the other hand, if you do the opposite, you may yet join the ranks of happy people everywhere!
There are stacks upon stacks of self-help books that will promise you love, happiness, and a fabulous life. But how can you pinpoint the exact behaviors that cause you to be miserable in the first place? Sometimes when we’re depressed, or just sad or unhappy, our instincts tell us to do the opposite of what we should—such as focusing on the negative, dwelling on what we can’t change, isolating ourselves from friends and loved ones, eating junk food, or overindulging in alcohol. Sound familiar?
This tongue-in-cheek guide will help you identify the behaviors that make you unhappy and discover how you—and only you—are holding yourself back from a life of contentment. You’ll learn to spot the tried-and-true traps that increase feelings of dissatisfaction, foster a lack of motivation, and detract from our quality of life—as well as ways to avoid them.
So, get ready to live the life you want (or not?) This fun, irreverent guide will light the way.
- Sales Rank: #14729 in Books
- Published on: 2016-05-01
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 6.90" h x .70" w x 5.00" l, .0 pounds
- Binding: Paperback
- 248 pages
Review
“Randy J. Paterson has hit a home run with this highly accessible, engaging book. How to Be Miserable uses tongue-in-cheek humor, scientifically grounded practical advice, and a healthy dose of what is colloquially known as ‘reverse psychology’ to help put an end to common behavioral patterns that contribute to unhappiness. Anyone who wants to be less miserable should read this book and do the opposite of everything it recommends!”
—Martin M. Antony, PhD, ABPP, professor of psychology at Ryerson University in Toronto, ON, Canada, and coauthor of The Shyness and Social Anxiety Workbook and The Anti-Anxiety Workbook
“Randy J. Paterson’s How to Be Miserable contains practical, witty, and wise advice, and is based on the premise that we have become our own worst enemies. Confronting our ‘management’ strategies consciously is the only way our life actually begins to turn toward better outcomes.”
—James Hollis, PhD, Jungian analyst, and author of The Middle Passage and Finding Meaning in the Second Half of Life
“Randy J. Paterson has failed miserably in his quest to create a recipe for unhappiness in How to Be Miserable, and instead has written a gem of a parody on how to cope with the inevitable difficulties we all must face in order to live a happy and fulfilling life.”
—Simon A. Rego, PsyD, ABPP, associate professor of clinical psychiatry and behavioral sciences at Albert Einstein College of Medicine/Montefiore Medical Center in New York, NY
“How to Be Miserable is a different kind of self-help book. By learning the forty traps that lead to unhappiness, readers will actually discover how to create the life they’ve always wanted—one filled with lasting happiness.”
—Matt McKay, PhD, coauthor of Thoughts and Feelings
"...for fed-up self-help readers, it may be the panacea they need."
—Publishers Weekly
"What makes this book from Paterson ("Your Depression Map") so delightful is that the author's obvious use of reverse psychology actually works as readers can laugh at their own behaviors. For instance, Paterson says that if a person wants a miserable life, then he or she should eat junk food, dwell on what "could be," read online news in endless detail, and eliminate the word "no" from their vocabulary. Although most readers will be accustomed to positive and negative behavior patterns, this work outlines the results of their favorite excuses for not acting in mentally healthy ways."
—Library Journal
About the Author
Randy J. Paterson, PhD, is director of Changeways Clinic, a private psychotherapy practice in Vancouver, BC, Canada. He is author of The Assertiveness Workbook and Your Depression Map, and he conducts training programs for professionals on evidence-based treatment. Through Changeways Clinic, Paterson presents lectures and workshops internationally on topics including mental health policy, cognitive behavioral therapy, the nature and treatment of depression and anxiety disorders, and strategies for private practice management. He is the 2008 recipient of the Canadian Psychological Association’s Distinguished Practitioner Award. For more information on Paterson, his presentations and workshops, or Changeways Clinic, visit www.changeways.com. To view Paterson’s blog on psychological and practice issues, please visit www.psychologysalon.com.
Most helpful customer reviews
13 of 13 people found the following review helpful.
Very Effective - Not Self Help, deep insight instead
By personalnjc
Do not think of this as a self help book. It is an learning book that rivals the best therapy session one could experience. It's aims are serious, and the author walks the reader through a contrarian approach to bring out the core activities, ways of thinking, and common responses to depression that can pave the way to a more abiding, intractable, and debilitating state of despair. Here reading is engaging in a therapeutic activity that brings insight, and challenges. It's method is to demonstrate how easy it is to use short term methods of eliminating pain that lead to greater, and more abiding, pain. The last chapter puts the book into crystalline focus and makes concrete and gentle suggestions on how to use what one learned from the book; methods to reverse a course we thought would help but now understand will not. The author's judicious use of humor and excellent writing created a book that might otherwise make the reader squirm with too much recognition; too much insight; too many truths. Despite being so effective, it is always accessible and ironically a pleasure to read, despite a feeling of interacting with someone who seems to know you all too well. This book is worth every minute you spend reading it.
5 of 5 people found the following review helpful.
Very, very helpful!
By Amazon Customer
Having struggled with depression and social anxiety since childhood, and now in my fifties, I can tell you that learning to treat myself with kindness instead of constant criticism has helped me a great deal. Randy Paterson's book How to Be Miserable is a wonderful and illuminating guided tour through the many ways we damage and defeat ourselves, and how knowing them gives us a lever to begin changing course. Wish I'd read it long ago, as it would have helped make my journey less difficult and my efforts more productive, as it is helping now. I've bought copies for both of my adult kids.
0 of 0 people found the following review helpful.
I have met the enemy and he is me.
By Disney Girl
This may be the most eye-opening book I have ever read. And I am laughing my face off reading it. I own so many self-help books (check the buying "stuff" chapter) but none has ever made me realize so clearly why I am always miserable. But Randy (who is my new best friend) lists an activity that will help you to be miserable. Then I say: "Yup. Yup. I do that all the time......" and then I could write the rest of the chapter. I had to give up tonight on the "Be Informed" chapter. I am so informed. I read the newspaper with the TV on with my phone by my right hand and my Kindle by my left. No one is more informed,(i.e. terrified, outraged, antagonistic, disgusted, etc.) than I am. For what? What am I going to do about it? If he needs a big, fat example of the prototype for his book, here I am. I'm going to work on this. During every waking hour (which will be many. I can sleep when I'm dead.) for the rest of my life. I will be passionate in the pursuit of my misery. I think Randy would be proud..
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